Two Year Olds are Insane

I've muttered it. I've confessed it to my husband and mom and close friends. Two year olds are insane. I've heard rumors that for some children it doesn't hit until age 3, but for us we're waist deep in all-the-time-wackadoodle!

This girl has sass. Don't even ask why she's only wearing an
 undershirt or about the arm tattoos. 

Example #1:
               About 10 minutes after Little Miss Muffet wakes up, we say something like, "Let's go down and get breakfast." Every morning (no kidding) she will scowl, stomp her feet, throw her bedtime friends and vehemently refuse breakfast claiming, "I WANT LUNCH!" As soon as I say, "Okay, Mommy will have breakfast and you can have lunch." She is all smiles, hugs, and sunshine. Crazy. [Yes, we have started to just call breakfast lunch, but that makes me feel like the crazy is winning.] 

Example #2:
              Before bed we always let Tabitha choose a book to take with her to bed. For me, I give her a choice, she chooses one, and it's lights out. For my poor husband, it's not so easy. She will go back and forth with him in a verbal dance that lasts up to 30 minutes. Here's a glimpse to how it generally goes...
                   D:  "You can have Goodnight Moon or Color Kittens."
                   T:   "No Daddy. A different book."
                   D:  "Those are your choices. Goodnight Moon or Color Kittens."
                   T:   "You choose Daddy."
                   D:  "Here's Color Kittens sweetie. I love you. Sleep tight."
                   T:   "NO! Different book Daddy."
               Repeat scenario three to four more times.

Example #3:
             During the day, I ask Sweet Potato to help around the house particularly with her things. It could be to clean up her toys, put away a coloring book, bring me her cup, or simply slow down. My first few attempts are nearly always met with resistance. She will declare her stand, "NO MOMMY! I don't pick-up! You do it." Then she runs to a corner. I think in her two year old crazy brain she thinks this makes her invisible. If you go over to her to lead her back to the chore, she is always surprised and then the angry kicks in. Flailing and screaming are her specialties in these situations. I'm thinking she could place for an Olympic spot in 2014.
              That sounds rather typical of a two year old. I mean tantrums are the most recognizable aspect of being two. However, if I walk away after such a classic display of behavior and ask her again in 5-10 minutes her most common response is, "Yes Mommy. I help." Say what?!?!?! Did we not just have a complete meltdown? Did she not just argue with me for 3 minutes about whether her crayons really needed picked-up? Serenity now.

I love my daughter. Most days I can laugh at and about her fickleness. I also take heart in knowing that her behavior today does not indicate her attitude tomorrow much less her personality in adulthood. Still, there are moments where the insanity seems larger than life and I feel myself drifting toward it. Pardon me if I take a moment and go a little nuts. I assure you that my worst is still more sane than her's. I think.

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